Monty Cauchons Flying Circus

Letters From Behind the Lines

Enemy-occupied territory – that is what the world is. … When you go to church you are really listening-in to the secret wireless from our friends: that is why the enemy is so anxious to prevent us from going.

- C.S. Lewis – Mere Christianity, II-2

Monty Cauchon’s Flying Circus

We are well into summer here behind the lines. Although the parliamentarians in Ottawa are currently on vacation, some of their number, including the members of the cabinet, still beaver away in the heat and humidity for which that city is notorious this time of year. On the basis of recent events, some of them seem to have been beavering away just a bit too hard.

As the calendar registers July 20^th, for many of us our thoughts turn to this date in 1969. Many of us were watching breathlessly as, in glorious black and white (remember that?), Neil Armstrong stepped off a ladder and set foot on the surface of the moon. Little do people realize that if one piece of legislation had passed in the State of Indiana, and had caught on in the rest of the United States, then events would have been somewhat different.

Consider what would have happened if House Bill No. 246, Indiana State Legislature, 1897, which passed in the House, had also passed in the State Senate. If it had, and if the other States and the Federal Government had adopted it, the value of o would have been, by law, set to 3.2. Now as one who had to make do with a slide rule and log tables in school and university, no doubt I would have found calculating answers somewhat simpler. However, on 20 July 1969, in front of my TV, rather than hearing about a small step for man and a giant leap for mankind, I might have heard something like this.

Eagle, this is Houston. Neil, we’re all set for you to exit the LEM and walk on the surface.

Houston, Eagle. How many times do I have to tell you guys that we’re not on the moon, and we can’t even locate the silly thing from wherever it is we are?

Eagle, Houston. Neil, we’ve been through this already. We’ve checked and double-checked our calculations, and there’s absolutely no question that they show you in the Sea of Tranquility.

Houston, this is Buzz. There’s nothing tranquil about our situation here. And the same goes for Mike in Columbia. Ever since we undocked, he’s just been going around in circles in the middle of nowhere, and he just told me that if has to keep going around in ever decreasing diametric circles much longer, he’s going to disappear up his own …

Buzz, this is Houston. Be aware you’re on an open channel.

Houston, this is Mike on Columbia. Buzz is right. No matter what I do, I can’t get the command module to go in a circle using the calculations you radioed up.

Eagle, Columbia, this is the flight director. I just got off the phone with the President, and he’s really getting hot under the collar. He just threatened to take the whole Apollo project away from NASA and put it out to tender to the airlines if we can’t behave lawfully. Now listen up. We’re going to reconfirm the calculations and get on with this while there’s still a chance. I want you guys …

[At this point, the television scene switches to Walter Cronkite, seated at his news desk with an expert from some Eastern liberal institute of higher learning.]

While they sort things out at mission control, I think it would be interesting to hear from our expert on just how we got to be in this present situation. Martin, what do you think went wrong?

Well Walter, as I’ve pointed out many times before, the process that took place years ago should have include a reference to the Supreme Court to answer three critical questions prior to its passage:

1. Is the draft bill within the exclusive legislative authority of the governments?

2. Is the section of the draft bill that redefines the value of o consistent with the Rights and Freedoms those governments have put in place?

3. Does the freedom currently guaranteed protect officials from being compelled to use the new value of 3.2 in a manner that is contrary to their beliefs?

By expanding the definition of the value of o to include 3.2, we were recognizing that everyone has equality rights under the constitutional guarantees. I believe that the governments did the right thing at the right time in our history. But they did it the wrong way.

After the Supreme Court had examined the draft bill and given its opinion on the questions above, a bill could have been introduced in the House, debated through the usual legislative process, and put to a free vote in the House before moving on to the Senate.

After all, Walter, a strong, effective democratic system depends on a dynamic dialogue between the legislature and the courts. This dialogue enhances the democratic process by ensuring that our laws reflect the fundamental values, like o. That is why the Government should have chosen that course of action. If they had, then we wouldn’t be in the situation we are right now, and Neil would be on the moon.

Gee, Martin, you’ve certainly given us something to think about.

Well, of course, Indiana didn’t go through with its change to the value of o, and Neil did walk on the moon. But it was a close run thing. The bill had passed the House, and first reading in the Senate (which had referred it to the Temperance Committee for an opinion), but was never killed. Debate on it was “indefinitely postponed.”

So now, behind the lines, we await the outcome of the latest act of folly on the part of the people’s elected representatives, and the judges they have appointed. There’s reason to be concerned. On the face of it, an incredible disconnect has occurred between what these people can see, and indeed what they actually believe. It’s not the first instance, either. The Prime Minister, eager for a legacy (and in the process of building himself one real lulu of a one), is supposedly a Roman Catholic, as is the man (another Martin) who is likely to succeed him. [As, for the record, is the writer.] Now the Roman Pontiff has recently delivered some very strong direction to men and women in public life, pointing out that they are not morally free to put their religious beliefs aside simply because they are in elected office. Mind you, there’s not much chance he will be listened to, if history is any indication. After all, the other Martin, the successor apparent, who apparently supports this folly, went on record when he first tried for the Prime Minister’s job about abortion. He said he was personally against it, but certainly wouldn’t let that influence his political decisions on the matter.

Well, one thing seems very clear here behind the lines this summer. Pontius Pilate, that consummate politician, certainly has a lot of disciples in Ottawa, as, one by one, the people in power line up to wash their hands of responsibility for putting sodomy on the same footing as marriage. And it’s not as if there weren’t some really pertinent questions they could have asked the supreme court, either. Sooner or later, if this folly prevails, someone will want an annulment. Perhaps they could have asked a pertinent question of the Supreme Court, such as, in a same sex “marriage,” what constitutes consummation?

The Indiana State Senators postponed consideration of the o bill because debating it was costing $275 a day. Here, behind the lines, we are left to wonder what this latest legislative and judicial peccadillo is going to cost. Meanwhile, many of us are left to pray, more fervently than ever,

God, keep our land

Glorious and free

as we seek to stand on guard for the country we love.