Greetings and salutations, sports
fans.
My topic of conversation this evening is one that really irks
me as a young Canadian. I'm here to discuss the most overrated,
over publicised, and overexposed sporting franchise in the
country. Yes, folks, believe it or not, I'm here to verbally
slam the Toronto Maple Leafs like they so rightly deserve.
You see, I'm not like most people around here. I can decide
on a sporting franchise on my own. I don't need the help of
the biased media, or the opinions of the rest of the lemmings
that decide to follow the Leafs just to be a part of the crowd.
I also can admit when my team loses. When they just weren't
good enough. Hell, I'm an Oilers fan and they didn't even
make the damn playoffs. No excuses, it just wasn't their year.
I can't wait to hear about Sundin's injury, or any other excuse
the Blue Shirted babies can come up with, as that seems to
be the norm for most Leaf fans.
No, not this time. No excuse is good enough. This team is
all wrong. Pat Quinn's coming back next season. That alone
shows that even the organization believes it's not wrong.
If I had a record of impotent performance such as his at my
job, my boss would make sure that the door hit me in the ass
on my way out. This is the same guy that decided Ron fucking
Francis shouldn't play in game six, and yet Antropov and Ponikarovsky
are still on the ice. What's up with that? No one cheered
louder than me when J. R. roofed that puck in O.T., and just
like a friend of mine, and fellow Leaf despiser, said, "the
only way it could've been better, is if he'd have banked it
off of Domi's face!"
And yet, when I turn on a tv, or open a newspaper, all I hear
is Maple Leaf propaganda. "They're Canada's team",
"they've got fans all over the continent", and "it's
a Leafs nation". Last I checked, this steaming pile of
refuse hasn't won a cup since Bunch Imlach coached them to
the promised land in 1967. Hell, they had to take that team
photo in black and white. Since then, three Canadian teams
have combined for 16 Stanley Cup victories. Montreal has 10,
Edmonton has five, and Calgary has one. Yeah, they're Canada's
team all right, and this weekend they can sit at home with
the rest of Canada, and watch the Calgary Flames in the Stanley
Cup Playoffs. Go Flames Go!!!
I'm a jerk, as is my want, and you just got...
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