The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single oy.
If you wish to know The Way, don't ask for directions. Argue.
Take only what is given. Own nothing but your robes and an alms
Unless, of course, you have the closet space.
Let your mind be as a floating cloud. Let your stillness be as the
wooded glen. And sit up straight. You'll never meet the Buddha with
posture like that.
There is no escaping karma. In a previous life, you never called,
you never wrote, you never visited. And whose fault was that?
Wherever you go, there you are. Your luggage is another story.
To practice Zen and the art of Jewish motorcycle maintenance, do the
following: get rid of the motorcycle. What were you thinking?
Learn of the pine from the pine. Learn of the bamboo from the
Learn of the kugel from the kugel.
Be aware of your body. Be aware of your perceptions. Keep in mind
that not every physical sensation is a symptom of a terminal
If there is no self, whose arthritis is this?
Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Forget this and
attaining Enlightenment will be the least of your problems.
The Tao has no expectations. The Tao demands nothing of others.
The Tao does not speak. The Tao does not blame.
The Tao does not take sides. The Tao is not Jewish.
Drink tea and nourish life. With the first sip, joy. With the
second, satisfaction. With the third, Danish.
The Buddha taught that one should practice loving-kindness to all
sentient beings. Still, would it kill you to find a nice sentient
being who happens to be Jewish?
Be patient and achieve all things. Be impatient and achieve all
In nature, there is no good or bad, better or worse. The wind may
blow or not. The flowering branch grows long or short. Do not judge
or prefer. Ask only, Is it good for the Jews?
To Find the Buddha, look within Deep inside you are ten thousand
flowers. Each flower blossoms ten thousand times. Each blossom has
ten thousand petals. You might want to see a specialist.
Be here now. Be someplace else later. Is that so complicated?
Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then
what do you have? Bupkes.
Do not let children play contact sports like football. These only lead to injuries and instill a violent, war-like
nature. Encourage your child to play peaceful games, like
Those who know do not kibbitz. Those who kibbitz do not know.
Enter into your inner self and behold the eye of the soul. Gaze upon your original face before you were even born.
Shocked? Remember, this was before the nose job.
To know the Buddha is the highest attainment.
Second highest is to go to the same doctor as the Buddha.
If you meet the Buddha on the path, show him the photos of the