I think that I can give you
a pretty good idea of how the mind control works and how they
incorporate it into the "program". However, there is so
very little information about Kalindi, Gourasana [David Swanson], or their daughter.
I have been researching and looking for facts. I have a
feeling if I could find out what they were doing before they started
MOL... don't know why but that seems like the missing piece of the
[* see below at
end, pieces coming in, includes link to an MOL survivors support
Their information packets and application forms are so careful and
planned. There are non-disclosure and hold harmless forms.
They ask for all kinds of personal information, and disclose very
little. Anyone entering the programs (Intensives and GMP workshops)
are already at a disadvantage and are completely at the mercy of the
people who staff.
The people who created MOL really knew what they were doing, as if
they all majored in mind control and airy fairy bogus faux eastern
spirituality. They have the same answer to nearly every hard
question, and that is that the questioner is not meditating enough,
not going deep enough, not giving into Kalindi enough. There have
been times that I have been on a group phone call and hard questions
were asked such as "Why does MOL reject homosexuals to the
practice?" Frankly I have heard differing takes on this
in the last three years... One was that Kalindi
found that she could only take these people so far. Then it
changed in a small way, I hope I am not saying this incorrectly, but
it was my understanding that MOL believed that homosexuals are
holding onto something in this world (illusion) and are not ready to
go on home this lifetime. It changed again about a year or so
ago that only homosexual men were excluded from returning home this
lifetime. Women who were primarily bisexual could do the work.
I do not know what the company line is now, however, when looking at
my husband's paperwork for attendance to the Intensive it still
states that MOL is only for heterosexuals.
As far as temper tantrums, I have personally heard Kalindi have at
least two of them on group phone calls. Seems like she is
especially hard on the people in the inner circle. There is
usually an opened phone call on January 2nd, her birthday.
Other higher ups have shown their tempers as well. I have read
that the followers of Osho are sometimes the brunt of anger and
there was some flak during an Intensive in Germany a number of years
ago. Also a german article about an open house hosted by MOL
questions were asked, and not sufficiently answered, re-asked and a
kind of breakdown happened. The staffers from MOL quickly
stopped the Q&A and played tapes, then gave all of the attendees
a yellow rose as a present from Kalindi.
Often hundreds (or we are told hundreds) of MOL people are made to
get together in centers, or in MOL member's homes and do group phone
calls. We all have to wait for 10 to 30 minutes on the phone
with nothing happening. Everyone has to be quiet and the
speaker phones must be on mute (people are sometimes bumped off the
phone call if not complying). Seemed to me that many time
while we were waiting to hear from Kalindi only to find out that she
was not going to be on the call. One time her daughter took
over the phone call, didn't really answer many questions... by that
I mean that when there were questions that they couldn't actually
answer they yelled at the questioner for not asking a good question.
Then we were forced to listen to her diary entries which were
shockingly un MOL like. She talked about going to bars,
working in a bar and the futility of living life... typical late
teenage angst. I think Kalindi's daughter's name is MaHa.
MOL really takes over peoples lives. People change their lives at
the whims of Kalindi. Kalindi decides that three people living in
San Diego are now going to move to Florida... well they have to go,
they cannot say no. They have to quit their jobs, find new ones,
move all of their things, sometimes get rid of pets, pull up roots and
leave their families. People who want to be in the inner circle
have such a short leash. [A friend] is in the inner circle and
she is pretty much unavailable. [Her relatives] flew out to visit
her and since MOL decided they needed her for some event, she didn't
get to spend much time out of that week to be with [them; other family
With another friend, they suggested that he speak with
their own councilor (he calls her long distance every other week...
he has never met her face to face.) She has influenced him in
many ways. She has been convincing him to separate from his
wife because she is not a MOLer. They also have a regular councilor
locally who I think believes the husband is in over his head with MOL,
but cannot say anything for fear of him bolting. My friend is
getting personal and emotional advice from a woman who is in the
inner circle of his religious/spiritual practice. He tells me
that this is no different than a priest giving councilling...
however I have told him I think that that is a grey area too rife
with potential for abuse.
My friend spends relatively little on MOL. He attends meditation
weekly which is $15 a pop, however it is probably going to go up.
A year ago it was $5 and some people were allowed to not pay if
money was tight. Everyone must pay now. There are 2
meditations a week, and they are pushing him to attend them both.
He also pays his councilor $60 every other week. People who
live in the centers or MOL houses also pay $100 a month as a fee,
and I suppose rent and utilities too. Everyone is supposed to
pay $100 a month to MOL as a membership fee. The workshops
cost from $400 to $700, and the last Intensive I heard about cost
about $2500. There are tapes which people have to buy... my
friend has a case with 24 tapes in it that have to be purchased to
take the GMP workshop - $150. There are probably 100 tapes or
more and each of them cost $10, with some series costing $60 to 290.
Complete path to God will run you $475. There are also CD's
and books. One book has
some provocative photos of Kalindi with inspirational quotes from
Kalindi. It is almost better than Playboy, but not quite
Hustler. MOL is really good about using consistant design, and
supplying all participants with loads of pamphlets and free tapes
(certain ones, not the $10 ones) to give to friends and family.
Even now I still get phone calls from participants trying to
convince me to attend the meditations again. I get an email
from one fellow almost weekly... but I don't blame him, I know it is
just the pressure that he feels from everyone else in the group.
It is a kind of group pressure coming from the inner circle and
passed around on the outer rim.
Kalindi says that she wants for thousands and thousands to come and
hear her message. Therefore it is up to the already controlled
to find people to bring. There are brainstorming sessions
where we think of everyone we know and try to invited them to either
a welcome home (for returning folks from the Intensive... the
freshly washed as I call them) and open houses. MOL is smart
in that they really put out the attractive folks to be their
"bringers". I have noticed that the older and
homelier folks tend to do more behind the scene work. They
convince people to be attractive to attract people to God.
They require that men shave their beards when they attend the
Intensive and pass out shavers at the door on the first day.
Men who already shave their beards, or do not have one must then
shave their legs. At first I thought this was weird for no
reason, but then it made me realize that they are putting fellows
off balance by taking away a manly part of them. Makes me mad
in a shallow way because I loved my husband's beard. I was
encouraged to wear makeup, which I used to not wear. We were
all encouraged during the Intensive to dress nicely and
professionally at all times... more for the attraction of people to
MOL. We were to carry Shout Wipes with us so that we could
avoid stains on our clothes. There are lists of things that
Kalindi wants us to have with us at all times. It is true that
Kalindi even has a list of products she wants everyone to use...
saves MOL people from having to make decisions at the grocery
store... I was surprised to have a friend tell me that they
use Kalindi endorsed laundry soap, shampoo, storage boxes. Kalindi
also promotes the use of plastic dishes and cups. Kalindi
makes all of these suggestions to bring God into lives.
As far as I know Kalindi lives in Hawai'i with a few followers.
I have heard rumors that a faction of followers who were homosexual
have left the group... I am not sure if it was from pressure of the
inner circle, Kalindi herself, Gayle [The Lady] or just that they got fed up
with having to hide that they were gay.
On that note, [another man I know] also attended the Intensive [his
wife] went to. She left him because he didn't want to give up
everything to be in MOL. He thought it was a good experience,
but that it wasn't for him. This was about the time that MOL
said that it wasn't for homosexuals. He is
bisexual. She divorced him and married a much
older man who was already a wealthy member of MOL.
One thing that it says on your site, that I am not sure is accurate
is about monogamy. There is actually a rambling book written
by Kalindi (by that I mean that she talked into a recorder and
workers later transcribed it) called Illusory Love Binds You, Love
of God Frees You. It is a crazy making read to be sure... here
is a random excerpt:
"You've got to unhook the two as two separate things because
they're both distinctly different. When you're having sex, you
may feel parts of your true Being because you can't get rid of your
true Being. Once your true Being comes through, it's in you. You're
not going to have sex and leave your true Being behind. Your
true Being in God is going to be inside of you, but you are still
engaging in the act of material sex pleasure. Have it for what
it is. Say what it is. Acknowledge what it is. Go
do it, and have a fun time doing it. It's a great material
pleasure, but it's not you True Self connection in God, even though
at the end of sex you might both be lying on separate sides of the
bed totally connecting into God. At that time, you True Self
connection is happening, but it's not because of each other.
It's because of what's happening inside of you with God..."
"I want to talk to you about something that can maybe make
sense to you, even though it's a very uncomfortable topic, and that
is exclusivity. It's one of the biggest areas that I want you
to take a look at--and this is going to happen for everybody on the
path to freedom, nobody will be spared this--you cannot have
self-manifestation of your True Self through these bodies if you are
in a relationship that is perpetuating the lie of exclusivity.
Exclusive love: "You are mine. I own you. I don't
want anyone to have you." This doesn't mean that everyone
has to go out and have every different kind of sexual activity
either. That's not the answer. Swing clubs aren't the
answer. Monogamy isn't the answer. The answer is to
release your Beings of the exclusivity, exclusive love, me/mine;
"You are mine. I am yours." The fact is we are all
God's. We are all in God. We are all in love with each
other in God. " Within relationships, what everyone is going to
have to come to face is that you cannot have exclusive rights to
your partner. Every single relationship that wants to break
free is going to have to face exclusivity. And, there are
going to be incredible relationships that develop. They're
going to be free. No matter what level you're on, on this
Path, you can just start to meditate about this. It doesn't
mean you have to do anything about it. Just thinking about it
is enough to move your feelings. Your partner is not yours to
own. That doesn't mean you can't have a committed
relationship, but somewhere within that commitment there needs to be
the opening that frees your Being so that the love of the True Self
is able to fully express itself..."
Any way that is just a taste of this book about the dangers of
exclusive relationships which seem to say that it is okay to have
sexual relationships with people other than your partner because it
brings one closer to God, however at the same time that cannot be an
excuse to have sex with another person. It is complicated and
confusing... not unlike most of the Kalindi writings and tapes.
Well, I am frankly tired from all of this focus on MOL. I hope
this wasn't too much to read. Please ask questions if you want
to. I will write again about the process of the GMP and
Intensive and how it relates to a mind control process.
Thank you so much for being an outlet for my frustration over MOL.
I hope I am not being too much of a drag.
. . .
There are three steps to the GMP.
The first part is primal screaming, the second is energetic dancing
(we chics love dancing... so that is my theory why there are so many
more women then men attracted to MOL) and the last part consists of
listening to a tape of one of the leaders, usually Kalindi... mind
is fairly opened when the body is exhausted.
The Intensive that I attended was a 6 day long event. We were
instructed to wear comfortable work out style clothing. We
were given each a fabric bag with tissues (there is lots of crying)
a MOL notebook with instructions for each day, a writing pad, extra
paper, pen and etc. A clear bag with cough drops, hand
sanitizer, toothpicks, shout wipes, lip balm, hand lotion and etc.
We were told that women could not wear makeup and men must all shave
their beards, and if they already shaved their beards they must
shave their legs.
We were shuttled in our own rental cars from the hotel to the
center. The center was in an industrial part of town.
The center itself was very plain and free from much ornament.
We arrived in a long line from the hotel and were greeted by blank
faces of those volunteering to staff the Intensive. We were
made to sit in rows on the floor, remove our shoes and wear
"indoor shoes" which were to have been scrubbed clean or
bought new for the occasion. Women were to have their hair in
We entered a large room like a warehouse with carpeting on the
floors. On the opposite side of the entrance was a kind of set
of risers, like in a school gym. There were a number of
volunteers all with blank expressions sitting and looking at us.
The ones in the front had tables in front of them, and many were
writing as the days went on.
A very attractive woman in her late 30's talked to us over an amplified
microphone. They made us all close our eyes, and there were
people yelling at those who would not... or who opened their eyes
after they had closed them. People would come up to me and rub
my back or stroke my arm.
For a number of days we were forced to talk about traumas.
Childhood, sexual, accidents, death, guilt, affairs, any bad thing
that we had ever done or had done to us. We were all pushed to
cry and to "have our hearts broken". We spent lots
of time after each session of heart break to scream and pound
pillows or other types of release to very loud angry or heart
breaking music. The music would change to heart pumping dance
and we would all dance until we were beat... some people couldn't
keep up... then the music would change again and there would be a
tape, or one of the women would talk to us about Gourasana and God
in a sing-songy type voice.
We would be lying on the floor crying and one of the leaders from
our group would be there comforting us... sometimes the same person
who was yelling at us that we weren't going deeply enough.
Sometimes the leaders would get frustrated because one person was
not sharing and they would tell us that they had all read our
applications and knew we were holding back.
In the morning of the first four days we were to wake up at 7 AM and
put on a specific tape and walk the grounds of the hotel. (We all had
to supply our own walkman for this.) Then we were given a simple
breakfast usually high in carbs, and no caffeine or sugar and shuttled
to the center. We were not given lunch but were encouraged to
bring our own power bars. Sometimes we were offered pieces of
fruit and nuts. We would shuttle to the hotel in the late afternoon,
and given a simple dinner... we were not supposed to speak at meals,
and groups were reprimanded for doing so.
We arrived at last to the hotel for sleep around 11 PM, sometimes
earlier or later. We were to stay with our group and work on
"home work" and were not to talk about other things.
At the end of the forth night we were pushed to an extra long dance,
and a very inspiring tape of Gourasana (the late David Swanson).
We were divided into groups and given each a designation. Some
of the men were told that they were the Knights, some of the women
were told that they were Brides of God, some women were given the
designation of God's mistress, and others were told they were God's
jester (men and women).
We were told that we would have to go out and find costumes to
complete this image. It was the first time that we were
allowed to be out in the non-MOL world... until that time our every
waking moment... and even our time sleeping... had been completely
dictated by MOL.
The next day the volunteer staff of MOL put on a huge party for us.
Each group had a chance to take the floor and dance. The DJ
had made a special mix of music for each group, and the participants
all danced very hard. Many volunteers and participants cheered
on. After the dancing the participants were each lead to a
chair and were given water and gatoraid and a towel.
The last day we were told to dress nicely, and most of the day was
dedicated to MOL stuff, like the books and tapes available...
thinking of other people we know that would like to come. Some
comments about the transformations people had experienced.
There was a video tape of Kalindi. We were all given a rose,
and people started leaving.
Later, when participants returned home the center at home would host
a "welcome home". In this the participant would
share their experience with friends or family members, or just other
people who were invited to find out more about the experience.
There is also an Advanced Intensive, a Youth Intensive (14 to 18
year olds) and a series of GO DEEPER days, some lasting for a week
to 30 days. These induce participants to take only cold
showers, eat a very simple diet such as oatmeal or rice for every
meal, giving up caffiene and etc and are called
"austerities". It should be stated that a prolonged
diet concentrated in carbs makes the mind more prone to suggestion.
It is a ploy used in prisons to control inmates.
People cannot run off and join MOL, like you would the circus.
MOL maintains that you are financially responsible and that you
continue to earn a living. There are no free rides with MOL, with
the possible exception of Kalindi.
(Sorry couldn't resist the last little dig there.)
MOL creates its own 'miracles' 'spontaneousness' and 'history'.
MOL maintains that David Swanson gave his body over to God and
became the "golden one" Gourasana. David died in the
mid 1990's and therefore cannot speak for himself... so Kalindi does
that for him now. They tell us that David did not really die,
he transcended this life. There is some rumour that he died of
cancer. Not sure. There was some talk that the doctors did not
understand the presents of God within him and did not diagnose his
death properly. It is hard to find facts about any of this.
Kalindi's roots are difficult to discern as well.
* A couple of correspondents
have indicated a source for MOL's "innovative" methods.
That the methods are effective in their way has been attested to by
numerous people. Less well known is the source, Lou Stolis, a
psychologist who died in 1999(?). He is said to have developed these
methods and Kalindi and David Swanson used them without
acknowledging their source.
One of my correspondents has written: "It is true that
Kalindi worked for Lou doing enrollment. She wished him to
take on a 'guru' role and he refused. She then started MOL
with her husband and directly used the processes and format Lou had
used in his training. I do not believe she gave Lou
credit or mentioned him. I know his wife went to one of their
introductory meetings and confronted them about it. They
didn't have much to say."
Another correspondent has supplied a link to the
Ross Forum page which discusses these issues further: rumours of
orgies, abuse, Hare Krishna history and more . . .
Another gossipy, mostly anon 3rd-hand discussion, with some facts and
spec, is the FactNet
page on MOL
And a Yahoo
Forum for MOL survivors was created in Aug 2004. As of Nov 2006 it is up
to 100 members.
[Added June 2006, an update from my first correspondent, some information
about new teachers not yet listed by me in the MOL "lineage"]:
of Love has opened a center in San Francisco called The Center for 21st
Century Transformation. They have also added new "masters", and I think
(if you have the energy) it is important to list these so-called
"masters" linked with Miracle of Love, Kalindi and etc, so that they
may be searchable for the unsuspecting.
[I am only listing them here for now, as they
are not billing themselves as awakened, etc. First was Marcia Makepeace,
whose Center for 21st Century Transformation runs "Global
Tele-Classes." She does not have a site nor any Googleable connection
with MOL, but the flyer supplied by my correspondent gave X@miracle.org
as a contact.
Oct '06 update: The above center now has a site,
though there is no explicit overt connection to MOL, beyond naming their
meditation as "the GMP, Meditation for This Age." The Center is
said to be across the street from the Church of Scientology's center.
There goes the neighbourhood! Next:]
(50's) of Asheville, NC, professes to be a meditation counselor, but
all endorsements are from fellow cult members. Quote from her site:
"Since 1994 she has been a Trainer for the Miracle of Love Intensive.
In 2001, she began leading Workshop (sic) in various locations in the
Unites States and Canada." It is thought that she passes off Miracle of
Love doctrine as legitimate therapy.
Word is that Kalindi is planning to move to Colorado Springs, and has
moved about 2 dozen people there to act as her support staff. They had
to move there, find jobs, and build a village... compound... sumptuous
setting for Kalindi's comfort and pleasure. I think that it has been
very difficult for these members. Kalindi told them not to let on to
the natives there what was happening, and to play down their being in a
The MoL website has less
and less information. For instance, there are Intensives planned in
certain cities, but no clue as to the locations. Too many would like to
undermine them. There was a new website at www.meditationforthisage.org
but it was suddenly pulled and is "under construction" for weeks and
And in Nov 2006 another MOL survivor
has approached me. She has already told her story as "the
Goose" on Rick Ross'
so i won't duplicate that but more may be coming. That page links to
others about MOL.
And added May 2007, a non-anonymous blog, My Life with Miracle of Love – NB Feb 2011, now at new URL, collecting all MOL posts in one dedicated blog – a substantial series
on MOL based on long personal experience. The author adds, "This
coming June 2007 I will be speaking in the International
Cultic Studies Association (ICSA)
in Bruxel, exposing for the first time to the academic world the
methods and beliefs of Miracle of love."
And Nov 2007, in the MOL update bag, a new explicitly MOL site,
suggesting they are not dead yet, miracleofloveseminar.org/,
with worldwide contacts for major events, etc, + a new repositioning
of their meditation format, Modern-Day Meditation™. Gourasana and
GMP™ are gone.
And of course, big news from April 2010 is Kalindi's death. The End
for MOL or her most astute career move yet? Stay tuned or hit <snooze>.