My first step in relationship counselling is to seek clarity about the viability of the relationship. Each individual is encouraged to be responsible for making his/her own decision about whether or not to continue the relationship. If the individuals are invested in preserving their relationship, we can then embark on an honest examination of relevant issues. Where mediation and conflict resolution is not viable then other alternatives (including separation) will be explored.

If child custody is an issue, my responsibility is to help the parents steer a course that allows them to remain involved in their children's lives. This is not an option if a parent is abusive or does not want to be involved with the children.

Because people are so infinitely different from one another, my core belief is that we must respect and honor these differences. In some relationships, this respect is lacking and couples find themselves abusing or being abused by the other. I have no hesitation in calling this to the couple's attention. Furthermore, I insist that they treat each other with respect within the confines of my office.